Fun Phallic Facts: 10 Penis Fun Facts

Nothing says summer like a cookout, and what is a cookout without wieners!? July is National Hot Dog Month, and Popstar is celebrating everyone’s favorite frank and male organ, the penis. To kick off our summer sausage fest, here are 10 fun penis facts! 

To start our list, we would be remiss not to begin with the very first erection. Most people would assume that your first erection occurs during puberty, or at least when you have developed object permanence. Wrong *insert game show buzzer sound*! Believe it or not, some ultrasound scans show fetuses with fully formed erections, most of which occur during rapid eye movement (REM) sleep. It is also common for babies to exit the womb at full mast. Perhaps they are just excited to enter the real world!

While we are on the topic of erections, let's take a moment to discuss nocturnal penile tumescence, more colloquially known as morning wood. Despite being called morning wood, it would see your penis is more of a night owl after all as most erections occur before you wake up. Just like babies in utero, most people with penises have erections during REM sleep, sometimes up to 5 per night. If you are experiencing morning wood, you are most likely just waking up during your final phallic performance of the evening. 

We’ve heard of morning wood, but have you heard of angel lust? Completely unrelated to angel dust, angel lust is when someone gets an erection after expiring. I suppose it is the human version of a chicken running around with its head cut off. Thankfully, angel lust occurs in the moments immediately following death. Otherwise, that would make for quite the awkward open-casket moment. 

Great news everyone! What if I told you your penis is twice as long as you thought it was? Yup, that’s right! As it turns out, half of your penis’ length is on the inside. With the average erect penis size being 5.1 inches, this would mean that just about everyone has a 10-inch monster!

If you have ever felt insecure about your penis size, find solace in knowing that you are, in fact, packing penile heat! Sure, no one can see it, but you know in your heart of hearts that you are swangin’ around a more than sizable schlong!

The world can be broken up into two groups of penis havers: growers and showers. If you are a grower, your penis starts smaller and grows when erect. A shower, on the other hand, is larger when flaccid and doesn’t get much bigger when erect. 

Moving on to another penile debate: cut or uncut. If you are American, chances are you (and most men you are running into in the locker room or bedroom ) are circumcised. However, if you get your plan on getting your passport stamped, be prepared to encounter some uncut gems, as uncircumcised are the norm almost everywhere else.

You know what they say: big socks, big…lie? Moving along with our penis size-related portion of the article is the wives' tale as old as time: shoe size can predict penis size. This myth was officially busted in a 2002 published study confirming that the two are not directly related. So what is a better predictor of penis size? Well, a study in 2006 found evidence proving that penile dimensions are more likely to be linked with age, height, and index finger. 

Wince warning! Just like bones can break, turns out boners can break as well. While there is no bone in the penis, it can still break, unfortunately. If you are up to date on Grey’s Anatomy, then this shouldn’t come as a shock to you. You might recall the Little Grey/McSteamy penile fracture incident. A penile fracture is the rupture of the fibrous tissue covering the corpora cavernosa, the tissue that expands when filled with blood. Penile fracture is usually the result of overly rough sex, so reverse cowgirl fans, proceed with caution!

No, this doesn’t circle back to our grower vs. shower debate. This has nothing to do with your penis returning to its size when flaccid after ejaculating. Your penis can shrink even further! While this may not be a fun fact, it is, in fact, a fact. Spinal cord injuries, atrophy, and certain prostate cancer treatments can lead to penile shrinkage. The good news is that it can potentially be avoided with treatments that improve blood flow to the penis like certain medications (think Viagra and Cialis) and vacuum erection devices.

Ending our list on a much lighter note. But believe it or not, that was the initial intent of the breakfast food created by Dr. John Harvey Kellogg. This Corn Flakes connoisseur hoped that creating bland foods would deter Americans from masturbation, which was at that time viewed as a sin. I just know this guy was turning in his grave when Frosted Flakes hit the shelves. We now know that masturbation is far from sin, but Corn Flakes being an underwhelming breakfast option still rings true!